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I’m so completely in love with the way Mr. Green writes

I’m so completely in love with the way Mr. Green writes

How would each sign react when they catch someone molesting their girlfriend/boyfriend?
Aries: Oh HELL no! *starts a fight and ends up breaking the person's jaw*
Taurus: What's going on here? Do I need to call the police? Hey, did you eat all my pizza? *are surprisingly calm the whole time*
Gemini: Wait, what are you doing? Are you MOLESTING him/her? Why would you do that? Are you crazy? Seriously, get a life. S/he is MINE. You clearly have nothing mildly interesting to do with your time, so you decide to be a creepy pedophile. Honestly... *and on, and on, and on* Though they probably wouldn't be deeply hurt, they'd just be confused and keep talking.
Cancer: *burst into tears and run away*
Leo: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE? Oh, my God. My. Life. Is. OVER! I can't believe you would do this, you gross creep! I thought I could trust you!!!!! *starts crying, just for effect*
Virgo: Oh yuck, that's so unsanitary. Honestly, some people are just so immature! Get over yourselves and stop trying to molest my romantic interests.
Libra: Ahh, this is just not fair! Honestly, you have no right to do that!
Scorpio: *joins in*
Sagittarius: HEY! Exactly what do you think you're doing? Get off [name] or I'm going to bash your face in *tries to look tough, but is actually trying not to laugh*
Capricorn: Can you just stop that nonsense right now? I'm trying to study. *wouldn't take it too seriously*
Aquarius: Oh, wow. You think you're soo cool, don't you?
Pisces: Am I hallucinating? Is this really happening? N-no, it can't be! *crying silently, looking around wildly* Are you okay? How do you feel? Oh, oh, I'm so sorry! I'm crying again. I need to stop doing that!
Source
Don't take these seriously. These are very stereotypical too.
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